why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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