I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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