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• (256): View more from Alabama

  There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week

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• (206): View more from Washington

  do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  Less talking, more tequila

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.

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• (+27): View more from South Africa

  She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?

  (1-204): View more from Manitoba

  Yep

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  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.

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• (310): View more from California

  I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas

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• (516): View more from New York

  If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.

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