covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize