Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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