Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
