She's JV to your varsity
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
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