you guys were way drunker than both of me
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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