She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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