Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
theres a video...