Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him? http://tfl.nu/uzgr
  Replies (65) Good night (781) Bad night (6698)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door. http://tfl.nu/5od7
  Replies (11) Good night (4484) Bad night (645)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss

  (757): View more from Virginia

  So when are we having a sleepover?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss (757): So when are we having a sleepover? http://tfl.nu/90ed
  Replies (24) Good night (6452) Bad night (721)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order. http://tfl.nu/n0bh
  Replies (12) Good night (928) Bad night (3712)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?! http://tfl.nu/mnfn
  Replies (370) Good night (5038) Bad night (5662)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot. http://tfl.nu/93sx
  Replies (26) Good night (7089) Bad night (1359)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns. http://tfl.nu/xebd
  Replies (56) Good night (13853) Bad night (1646)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now. http://tfl.nu/rvu6
  Replies (10) Good night (4180) Bad night (1027)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll http://tfl.nu/nron
  Replies (10) Good night (1312) Bad night (3117)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why. http://tfl.nu/r7vy
  Replies (7) Good night (2317) Bad night (824)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking. http://tfl.nu/c4hu
  Replies (0) Good night (861) Bad night (429)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it http://tfl.nu/dka3
  Replies (7) Good night (584) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's? http://tfl.nu/t57e
  Replies (6) Good night (726) Bad night (351)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along. http://tfl.nu/d3ni
  Replies (2) Good night (614) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde? http://tfl.nu/3wcs
  Replies (5) Good night (440) Bad night (355)

Randomize