He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
We named our party play list daddy issues
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I deserve this hangover.
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