everyone is single if you try hard enough
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Acid is not a monday night drug
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you