hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
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