My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
He did a backflip because drugs
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
