I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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