Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
