Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
