there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize