Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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