is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
