I molested 6 butterflies tonight
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
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