Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
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I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
You've changed since you got that strap on
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