I want to stick my p in your. b.
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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