I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
