she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize