first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
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No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
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He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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