Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
