I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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