WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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