Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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