remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
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