Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize