So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
This is classic penis vs brain.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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