Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize