talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
