I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
