so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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