very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
kristin has been a bad kristin
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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