My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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