8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
