I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
