and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
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