barbara walters just said penis...
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Green mimosas i think yes
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I deserve this hangover.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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