yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Randomize
