Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize