Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
