3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
How does it feel to date your dad?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize