You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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