brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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