My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
