Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
