he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
